Dear People not in Gravity Falls
by ML-AWESOMENESS
Summary: Since I made one for HTTYD, I decided to make one for Gravity Falls, my favorite TV show! Dipper, mabel, Soos, and everyone else that we know of in Gravity Falls have read your fanfictions and are out to get you. Rated T because Wendy and Stan have potty mouths. And Dipper gets mad when he gets mad.
1. Bill has his EYE on shippings

Dear People not in Gravity falls,

What is with your facination with pairing me with shooting star and pine tree? Ahem, Mabel Pines and Dipper Pines. I am a frikin dream demon, not some petty human. So stop making me go all good and lovey dovey with some puny little 12 year old. I know every thought that you have ever had in your life. I am the all seeing eye. I SEE EVERYTHING! THE PAST AND THE FUTURE!

*Blows up computer*

I'll be watching you!,

Bill Cipher

**Since I did one for HTTYD, I decided to make one for Gravity falls! I mean no offense to people who do BilDip or MaBill. I also don't own Gravity Falls. Peace! Not really!**


	2. Thoughts on Pinecest

Dear people not in Gravity Falls,

Hi! Its Dipper! Ugh, and Mabel. Not to mention Waddles. Shut up! But what I - er - we - wanted to say was...

STOP SHIPPING US!

Why would we have sex with eachother?! She's my sister for God's sake! And were only twelve! So stop. I have my journal, and I can summon a barf Fairy. Trust me, one of Mabel's sweaters was ruined. You don't want to mess with her.

AAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!,

Dipper and Mabel (And waddles!) Yes, and Waddles

**haha. I hate Pinecest, Rebellegirl is my indentical twin, and if we were fraternal twins, I would hate to be shipped with her. ****Please consider the twins here!** **If you ship this, I mean no offense, and I don't own Gravity falls. Sapphire, away! (jumps back and crashes into wall) Oww...**


	3. Every living thing

Dear people not in Gravity falls,

Do I have to be paired with everything that moves? There's Mabel (Ugh, she already annoying), Candy (Why?), Wendy (Errr... Mixed feelings, mainly thankfullness), your stupid OC's (And Mary-sues with unique powers, and with "unmistakeable" beauty), Pacifica (She's bitchy enough when she's not in love), then Robbie and Bill!?

If this is what it's going to be like, then I don't even want to be in love here in Gravity Falls! I'd rather find one in my own town.

I hate you (Except for the Wendy thing),

Dipper

**I don't mean any offense, I don't own Gravity Falls, Sapphire, OUT!**


	4. Mermando and ONLY Mermando

Dear people not in Gravity falls,

Ugh, why are you pairing me with Pacifica? She's a one dimensional beach blonde valley girl Stereotype who doesn't know what sharing is, and I am a lovable twelve year old who's good at minigolf, and like to knit and put stickers on peoples faces! And you are pairing me with Dipwad (Dipper), Robbie (Who wears a gallon of body spray, ugh), Bill (HE TRIED TO KILL ME!), and then your OC's?! I'm just glad you don't pair me with Grunkle stan or Gideon. But I am glad that you pair me with Mermando. He's cool.

Puwease stop not shipping me with Mermando,

Lady Mabelton

aka Mabel

**I ship Mabel and Mermando, so I totally agree with you Mabel. I don't mean any offense by this, I don't own Gravity Falls, Goodbye.**


	5. Wendy hates guys

Dear people not in gravity falls,

Seriously, what is with these pairings?! Wendip? Puhlease. We already sorted that out, we're just friends. And I'm too old for him. WenBill? I've never even seen Bill, and I heard he's a **Dream Demon **, so there is no way that I would be in love with him. And me with Robbie? NEVER! Just don't pair me with Tambry or Mabel. That would be akward. And wrong.

Seriously, I'm watching you wherever you go,

Wendy

PS: I can use an axe. I'm the daughter of a Lumberjack.

**Thanks to GravityVanel14 for the WenDip suggestion. I don't mean any offense and I dont own Gravity Falls.**

**Peace, Love, and SMILE DIP! ON NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM.**


	6. 1000 up for grabs

Dear poor people,

Wow, you guys are real dorks. I mean, making me kiss that Dipwad? Seriously, you poor people have lost your mind. Then there's the old lady girl and me. That's just wrong. Like, I'm not a lesbian. Then Miss fork fingers? Puhlease, like I'd ever fall for her. And then Robbie, who is three years older than me. and ugly. I'm just glad you don't pair me with wrestler girl.

Why don't I give you, say, $1,000 to forget all of this, erase your stories, and never do that again.

Sincerely,

Pacifica Northwest

**Note: I am not giving away thousands of dollars. I don't even have that much. I don't mean any offense, I don't own Gravity Falls, And Give Pacifica a hand, fools!**


	7. Dipper sneezes like a kitten

Dear people not in gravity falls,

Why are you making me a girl? I am a man. And I don't sneeze like a kitten. And even if I do, some manly men sneeze like kittens too. And even If I was a girl, I would't be dating Gideon.

The male twin,

Dipper

**Hey! I have some answers to reviews that I would like to say: **

**SongofPeace16: Not originally. And I got bored with it, so I made it a one-shot. Then Barely anyone was reading it. So I deleted it. **

**GravityVanel14: I don't know what ParaPines is. I belive it is Paranorman and Dipper/mabel. Sadly, I have no clue what Paranorman looks like because I have never seen anything with his character in it.**

**I don't own Gravity Falls, I don't mean any offense, And my birthday is coming up soon.**


	8. From the bighouse

Dear people not in Gravity Falls,

I am alive, you know! And I'm famous, too! I am the best of the best in my industry, and I can buy and seel all of you! I want more fanfictions of me winning, getting rid of Dipper pines, and taking Mabel as my Queen! I will have my revenge soon enough! You want to be on my side before everything changes! You need me! Aaahhh! Not the broom! Stop it! You'll hear from my lawyer- Aaahhh!

From the bighouse,

Lil' Gideon

**If I saw Gideon, I would hit him with a broom too. I remember I read a story on my phone about if Gideon won. He used the journals and everyone except for the people on the Cipher wheel were controlled by him. It contained a bit of MaBill (Which I kind of like, If Bill were to turn good. but I don't think he will, honestly). At the last chapter I had read Mabel sacrificed her freedom to let Stan, Dipper, Wendy, and Soos (I think soos) go. But i cleared the History on my phone, and I don't know what it's called, so i can't find it. If any of you have read a story like this can you please review what story it is, because I would like to add it to my alerts list.**

**I don't own Gravity Falls, I don't mean any offense, the world is going to end. (Not really)**


	9. ERMEGURD SLERNDERMERN

Dear people not in gravity falls,

Yes, I do have a crush on Dipper. He's cute and smart. But you will not tell him. He's already crazy about that teenager. Don't think that I will kill or harm her to get Dipper as my own, I would never do such a thing. Needless to say, it's kind of hopeless because he doesn't live here. If he did, then this letter would not be here.

Sincerely,

Candy

**Thanks to Slenderman for this idea. But it wasn't just you're regular old Slenderman. It's Slenderman... 2.0! I don't own Gravity falls, i don't mean any offense, Happy new school year!**


	10. Tacos

Dear people not in Gravity Falls,

I will never go to taco bell. End of letter.

I don't like tacos,

Dipper

**NNNUUUUUUUUUUUUU! TACOS! OMNOMNOMNOMNOM! Thanks to Neothefallingicecream for this idea. I am going to be making these letters shorter because of homework from school. I don't own Dipper goes to Taco bell, I dont mean any offense, and I don't own gravity falls.**


	11. There's smart, dumb , and Soos

Dear people not in gravity falls,

I am not stupid. Not really, at least.

Sincerly,

Soos

**SORRY I HAVEN"T UPDATED FOR A WHILE! I've been way to busy. I neglected my homework for this. And I am a straight A student. Well, I was last year. I got this idea from Gideon rises part two, i think. SOOS IS'NT DUMB! YES! I probably am going to be updating this on weekends only. Maybe two or three times. I don't own gravity falls, I don't own Gideon rises by Grapplinghook (you are awesome BTW if you are reading this), and i don't mean any offense.**

**Can we get to 50 reviews? 100? I hope we can before I update the 20th chapter. NOW LET'S MAKE IT HAPPEN!**


	12. Dipper's a girl!

Dear people not in Gravity falls,

I have a male counterpart? Holy crap, he must be shrimpy. I heard Bill say something about it, but I never imagined that it was true. And BTW, why are there only 3 fanfiction that I'm in? And even those didn't get my name right. It's Marcus and dipper.

Sincerely,

Dipper pines

**I like to genderbent things. Sorry I haven't been updating a lot. School sucks ass. But I can update from my tablet, so that's a plus. I also got a Deviant art account. It's called ML-awesomeness, please follow or something. I don't own gravity falls, I don't mean any offense, goodbye.**


	13. Punching hands DUNUNUUUUNNN!

Dear people not in Gravity falls,

Who is the author of the journals? Clues lead me to believe that it is someone who's name starts with an F because th laptop was property of F. If you find out, don't hesitate to tell me.

Best regards,

Dipper pines

Ps: yes, I did punch those hands

**hey guys! Sorry for the super long wait. I blame turtles because of potatoe. I don't own gravity falls, I don't mean any offense, goodbye. **


	14. Who wrote the journals?

Dear people not in Gravity falls,

So, I know that old man MCgucket didn't write the journals, so who did? I don't know how many pens I've broken because of my thinking. Ugh, I can't sleep without dreaming of me finding the guy. Do you people have any idea who it might be? Signs are pointing all over the place, but I can't be sure if I have the correct evidence or not. What If Blendin Blandin wrote the journals and lost them in the past? What if Stan wrote them? What if Quentin Trembly wrote them? UUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH! WHO THE HELL WROTE THE FRIKIN JOURNALS?!

Sincerely Frustrated,

Dipper Pines

**Hey, BTW in case you haven't noticed, I changed my name to ML-AWESOMENESS from Sapphire Nightfury. I can't wait until Nov 10, I really want to see Blendin's game. FUTURISTIC SPACE PINES! I don't own gravity falls, I don't mean any offense, and PLEASE VOTE ON MY POLLS! **


	15. Soos and his girl, or pizza?

Dear people not in Gravity falls,

Hi, it's Soos here. I wish to tell you that me and Melody and I are still going strong and she Is a very good visionary. However, it a little weird just talking to her through a computer, but I still get to see her. I have to go finish my Infinite pizza right now, so bye.

BACK TO PIZZA,

Soos

**Hey, its ML here, and I want an infinite pizza slice too Soos! Wait, I get a bite? HECK YEA! **

**(A few hours of pizza later)**

**Om, nom, ugh, I'm full. THANKS SOOS! Now remember dawgs, rappers are visionaries, I don't own gravity falls, and I don't mean any offense. **


End file.
